Istiadat Menyembah for No. 3 Son.

30.4.2012.

Saturday 28th.April  was exactly one week after the wedding reception at Merak Kayangan, KL. That was the day we had the "menyembah" ceremony in Seremban for No.3 Son & Lula.

Basically this was the occassion when the newly weds were formally introduced to the "saudara kadim". In the old days the couple would have taken several days to meet formally with the uncles and aunties on both sides of the groom's family. These days a one-day affair like this is more suitable because of time constraints. Then again not everyone does it "anymore anyways". But in our case, just as was done with the two older brothers when they were married, this was something we thought was good for the new bride, for future close relationship with,well, relations.

Pak Cik Piei,as usual, was elected to be master-of-ceremony. He had taken the trouble to prepare a "pantun" each for each pair of uncles and aunties, as they were introduced by turn to the "pengantin".

Present that day were, on Idah's side, Kak Munah, Bang Din's widow, Bang Sudin and Kak Mot, Bang Dek and Kak Zawiyah, Kak Ani and Bang Piei,  Bibah Aji, Ari and Wira, and Izul and Bal. On my side were Fadzil and Umi, Karim and Acam, Ajit and Yah, Ati and Nazri, Yan, and Poat and Sabrina. Din and Lijah came after the ceremony and so missed all the "pantuns". Missing were Bang Tai and Kak Inam, who are in Kuantan, Nodi and Ruslin, who are in Sabah, and Dek Mah, who was supposed to come but went to Melaka instead. Both pairs of parents were present, of course, as were several first cousins with some of the spouses and some of the  children. Altogether there were about 100 of us.

Each of the immediate uncles and aunts  received the "boko" of wajik (sweet glutinous rice) and for that they gave the "pengantin" cash gifts as a sign of "payment" for the "boko". In fact newly-weds received a generous sum.

We had "high-tea" afterwards, with some karaoke music, with several family members participating, All in all it was an enjoyable afternoon. The whole thing wound down by about 6.30 pm. The caterers and karoake operators cleaned up  before leaving, and the couple, Bang Jat, Adib, Iman and the two of us retired inside, happy with a successful "menyembah". I was  dead tired. 

No. 2 Son,  Ija and their kids left for a "kenduri" in Bangi.

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No. 3 son's wedding etc.

29.4.2012.

After, I can't remember, how many months, I finally pulled myself back to the old pc to write about No. 3 Son's  wedding last week. The long break was forced by the modem and the cpu being put down by both virus and lightning. I was just too lazy to replace and repair them quickly enough.

For the wedding, for a change, my wife and I decided to have a joint reception with our new in-laws in KL, rather than having a repeat performance in our hometown, after the bride's "kenduri". We thought we'd save cost and energy. It turned out to be neither.

For one thing, the KL bash was much more expensive than what we thought it would be. For another, the  sheer logistics were  truly energy-sapping. When we finally came back home the Sunday noon, I took a nap that lasted till 6 p.m.!

The 2-day affair went nicely, however. The "aqad nikah" was well-attended but not too large to lose the "family feeling", with a beautiful and colourful setting.  No. 3 Son  utterred the wordings with one take only.  Sometimes they take strangely long. 

The grand dinner was  great. Only the "crowd control" and "event-content" were tested - the crowd being bigger than expected, and the entire event longer than planned. Both were the direct results of an untried joint-venture.

I had spent some time in preparing for my acknowledgement speech,   a  must at weddings these days. By the time I was finally called upon to deliver, it was already  past the hour, and I had wanted to give it a pass.  But that was being  difficult, and so I  proceeded

anyway.

It is customary for me to have a written text. Even in those  days when public speaking was part-and-parcel of my job, "official" speeches were always from written texts. This is for two good reasons - so that I don't forget the points, and so as not to stray from  the time frame.

This was a gist of what I said:

1. Welcome Honourable Guests and Thank You.

2. I couldn't invite as many people as I like, so I have to prepare for the complaints.

3. I have some advice for the blessed couple -

      learn to respect each other long after the infatuation wears off

     you have a vast network of family & friends to fall back on at all        times

   it's your turn in the cycle of life, improve upon both parents' record.

Of course they were not in exactly those words, nor and in that order. But  I did also say "when we're young we often smell of "minyak wangi". But when we're old, we smell  "minyak cap kapak".  I added a little extra touch by quoting Pak Cik Piei who said "if a man opens the car door for a woman, it's either a new car or a new wife!". Ha ha!

I specifically told my daughter-in-law about the speech before the reception.  I won't touch on their academic achievements etc. These days parents at weddings make it a point to highlight the fantastic scholastic achievements of their off-springs. Which is perfectly legitimate, by the way. As far as I know, my son and his brand-new bride have very good jobs and the future looks bright.  It's all up to them now. 

I asked, in my short speech, that my guests join me in praying for

the well-being of the couple. Amin !

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